PG Marriages
One day:
Mom: Shall I get you new clothes for your Birthday?
Son: Don’t worry mom. I’ll buy it by myself.
Another day:
Mom: Your Dad & me are just thinking. Shall we get you married?
Son: Hmm! Ok. But try to get a nice girl who suites our family.
Such a situation occurs for fellas, be it a guy or a girl, for whom love didn’t strike or even if it had struck, it would have struck the wrong chord. Yep! We are talking about arranged marriages that aren’t out of love. There can be love from the parents, but definitely not between the guy & the gal.
Such marriages are good in a societal setup; telling people that the guy or the girl isn’t on the loose. But certainly, its a blow for the internal values of the individual. For a person who grows with fulfilling his needs by himself, this is for sure a failure case. A desire un-accomplished with his mere & meek abilities. Something he is incapable of, that brings in embarrassment to the core.
You may counter, that its all within the parents & the child, & there’s nothing to feel low of. But the truth is, the parents are so very caring, forgiving & more importantly forgetting the real twists in their child’s behaviour. Even the child is little bold enough to ask for things that he/she hasn’t mastered enough. It all happens for the sake of “One Big Happy Family”.
In case you are still wondering what the PG in the title means, its Parental Guidance. :)
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akp said,
November 21, 2007 at 11:50 pm
Well written! I myself am half through writing a blog on ‘marriages’… some things need to be changed… but as is always, changes come in at a very slow pace… :(
akp said,
November 21, 2007 at 6:20 pm
Well written! I myself am half through writing a blog on 'marriages'… some things need to be changed… but as is always, changes come in at a very slow pace… :(
sangs said,
November 22, 2007 at 3:38 pm
can’t say its failure. Know a lot of my friends who opted out of love marriage just ‘cos their parents wouldn’t accept and not that they were not capable of finding a good partner for themselves.But,yea ,I really am unable to figure out yet how ,how can you say yes to someone you dont even know ?!!! Beats me !!
sangs said,
November 22, 2007 at 10:08 am
can't say its failure. Know a lot of my friends who opted out of love marriage just 'cos their parents wouldn't accept and not that they were not capable of finding a good partner for themselves.But,yea ,I really am unable to figure out yet how ,how can you say yes to someone you dont even know ?!!! Beats me !!
Sami said,
November 23, 2007 at 6:51 pm
Love and Arranged, Rendum onnuthaan boss !
Love or Arranged, Face pidichiruntha thaan makkal approach-e panranga !
Love or Arranged, Pala matter pesaranga particularly boy and girl are discussing much b4 parents start discussing. View, opinion, approach and everything else ellam pesaranga. Othu vantha parents kitta solranga. Parents mudikaranga. Love-um athey katha thaan. Love vandha vudane parents kitta solli sambantham vangina, arranged marriage-ku enna time kidaikumo athey time thaan love marriagekum kidaikkum.
Sudden-a oruthara parthu eppadi solrathuna, love panrathuku munnadiyum appadithaane? Intha mathiri q’s venumna, ladies-ku nyayama irukkalam but not for males ;)
Ellathukkum Dhil venum. Thats all !
Sami said,
November 23, 2007 at 1:21 pm
Love and Arranged, Rendum onnuthaan boss !
Love or Arranged, Face pidichiruntha thaan makkal approach-e panranga !
Love or Arranged, Pala matter pesaranga particularly boy and girl are discussing much b4 parents start discussing. View, opinion, approach and everything else ellam pesaranga. Othu vantha parents kitta solranga. Parents mudikaranga. Love-um athey katha thaan. Love vandha vudane parents kitta solli sambantham vangina, arranged marriage-ku enna time kidaikumo athey time thaan love marriagekum kidaikkum.
Sudden-a oruthara parthu eppadi solrathuna, love panrathuku munnadiyum appadithaane? Intha mathiri q's venumna, ladies-ku nyayama irukkalam but not for males ;)
Ellathukkum Dhil venum. Thats all !
Ranjhith said,
November 26, 2007 at 10:19 am
@akp
Welcome to Thrattle. :) Wen’t thro’ your blog. Touched upon very interesting topics. Keep it going. :)
@sangs
> who opted out of love marriage
:P This is another kinda failure.
> how can you say yes to someone you dont even know ?
In a crude way, its the mankind’s urge that makes one say a “yes”. :)
@Sami
> Sudden-a oruthara parthu eppadi solrathuna,
> love panrathuku munnadiyum appadithaane?
Yenna, “I love you” innu solli, oru ponne 1st week laye madaki irrupeenga pola. :P
Love is to be grown, like in tissue-culture. You work for it & you gain it. Neenga sollurathu, “Kandathaum Kaadhal”, I agree. But its love only when, “Sonnaal thaan Kaadhal”. This part takes time.
Its like saying, its “truth” only when you tell everyone, otherwise its just a “secret”. :)
Aparna said,
November 26, 2007 at 1:52 pm
First of all, you are against marriage itself. Then why are you now even arguing about which type of marriage is better? :P
>Love is to be grown, like in tissue-culture. You work for it & you gain it. This part takes time.
Even after arranged marriage, you can work for love and let it grow. :P You have all the time here to let it grow.
ranjhith said,
November 26, 2007 at 4:49 am
@akp
Welcome to Thrattle. :) Wen't thro' your blog. Touched upon very interesting topics. Keep it going. :)
@sangs
> who opted out of love marriage
:P This is another kinda failure.
> how can you say yes to someone you dont even know ?
In a crude way, its the mankind's urge that makes one say a “yes”. :)
@Sami
> Sudden-a oruthara parthu eppadi solrathuna,
> love panrathuku munnadiyum appadithaane?
Yenna, “I love you” innu solli, oru ponne 1st week laye madaki irrupeenga pola. :P
Love is to be grown, like in tissue-culture. You work for it & you gain it. Neenga sollurathu, “Kandathaum Kaadhal”, I agree. But its love only when, “Sonnaal thaan Kaadhal”. This part takes time.
Its like saying, its “truth” only when you tell everyone, otherwise its just a “secret”. :)
Aparna said,
November 26, 2007 at 8:22 am
First of all, you are against marriage itself. Then why are you now even arguing about which type of marriage is better? :P
>Love is to be grown, like in tissue-culture. You work for it & you gain it. This part takes time.
Even after arranged marriage, you can work for love and let it grow. :P You have all the time here to let it grow.
Ranjhith said,
November 27, 2007 at 12:44 pm
@Aparna
I’m not against marriage! What made you to think so? :O
I didn’t argue anything. I was just expressing an individual’s concern & change of attitude while he grows-up to tie a knot.
> Even after arranged marriage, you can work for love …
One has to do such, otherwise theres no escape. :) But the irony with this kinda love is, it is with more of a “compulsion” than being more “natural”. One can snap such a compulsion with a divorce. But again he/she is compelled to find one soon. You see nothing appears natural, like “it just happened”.
ranjhith said,
November 27, 2007 at 7:14 am
@Aparna
I'm not against marriage! What made you to think so? :O
I didn't argue anything. I was just expressing an individual's concern & change of attitude while he grows-up to tie a knot.
> Even after arranged marriage, you can work for love …
One has to do such, otherwise theres no escape. :) But the irony with this kinda love is, it is with more of a “compulsion” than being more “natural”. One can snap such a compulsion with a divorce. But again he/she is compelled to find one soon. You see nothing appears natural, like “it just happened”.
Sami said,
November 27, 2007 at 7:11 pm
vayasu kolaaru :) romba kozhapikatheenga ;)
Arranged-o Love-o,
Manushan Nalla irukanumna Give
Thaan ore vazhi…
Thanee Vazhi…
all come take maadi ;)
(See, oru vadivelu comedy, TR speech parthathaala vandha epect-u , english thaaru maar-a irundha kandukatheenga )
Sami said,
November 27, 2007 at 1:41 pm
vayasu kolaaru :) romba kozhapikatheenga ;)
Arranged-o Love-o,
Manushan Nalla irukanumna Give
Thaan ore vazhi…
Thanee Vazhi…
all come take maadi ;)
(See, oru vadivelu comedy, TR speech parthathaala vandha epect-u , english thaaru maar-a irundha kandukatheenga )
Ranjhith said,
November 28, 2007 at 2:01 pm
@Sami
> Manushan Nalla irukanumna Give
> Thaan ore vazhi…
> Thanee Vazhi…
Thalaivali. :P
ranjhith said,
November 28, 2007 at 8:31 am
@Sami
> Manushan Nalla irukanumna Give
> Thaan ore vazhi…
> Thanee Vazhi…
Thalaivali. :P
Sami said,
November 28, 2007 at 10:12 pm
Love vs arranged-nu vandhale thalaivali thaan ;)
Sami said,
November 28, 2007 at 4:42 pm
Love vs arranged-nu vandhale thalaivali thaan ;)
Ranjhith said,
November 29, 2007 at 10:29 am
@Sami
Confirmed! Sariya maati irrukeenga pola. :) Best wishes.
Sami said,
November 29, 2007 at 2:59 pm
@Ranjhith,
I gues this is the second post on this series ( i remember some post about girl friend approval..etc)…So Best Wishes to Ranjhith Kumar :)
Nambala yaarum innum asaikkala pa !
ranjhith said,
November 29, 2007 at 4:59 am
@Sami
Confirmed! Sariya maati irrukeenga pola. :) Best wishes.
Sami said,
November 29, 2007 at 9:29 am
@Ranjhith,
I gues this is the second post on this series ( i remember some post about girl friend approval..etc)…So Best Wishes to Ranjhith Kumar :)
Nambala yaarum innum asaikkala pa !
Aparna said,
November 29, 2007 at 9:44 pm
One of your previous Intellisparks made me think like that.
Btw even in the case of love marriages, once the initial attraction or whatever fades away, they are compelled to work on keeping their love alive :P
Aparna said,
November 29, 2007 at 4:14 pm
One of your previous Intellisparks made me think like that.
Btw even in the case of love marriages, once the initial attraction or whatever fades away, they are compelled to work on keeping their love alive :P
Sukla M C said,
December 1, 2007 at 11:41 am
nice one . . . .
Sukla M C said,
December 1, 2007 at 6:11 am
nice one . . . .
Ranjhith said,
December 1, 2007 at 8:18 pm
@Sami
Neenga thaan konjam asainjuteengala? :P But still, I guess, something fishy has happened. :)
@Aparna
Very true. But in love marriages, there is some kinda attachment/belonging as the marriage was initiated by the individuals & not their parents. This due responsible feeling makes the initial love to survive much longer.
@Sukla
Hey! Welcome to Thrattle. Thanks. :)
ranjhith said,
December 1, 2007 at 2:48 pm
@Sami
Neenga thaan konjam asainjuteengala? :P But still, I guess, something fishy has happened. :)
@Aparna
Very true. But in love marriages, there is some kinda attachment/belonging as the marriage was initiated by the individuals & not their parents. This due responsible feeling makes the initial love to survive much longer.
@Sukla
Hey! Welcome to Thrattle. Thanks. :)
Sami said,
December 6, 2007 at 10:36 am
@ranjhith,
Intial attraction individuals-la vandha enna, vera reasons-la vandha enna… rendu eduthalyum love poiduchuna, marriage gaali
Ellam onnum thaan.
Fishy-avathu mannagattiyavathu ! Unga mela thaan doubt, double confirmed hehe ;)
Sami said,
December 6, 2007 at 5:06 am
@ranjhith,
Intial attraction individuals-la vandha enna, vera reasons-la vandha enna… rendu eduthalyum love poiduchuna, marriage gaali
Ellam onnum thaan.
Fishy-avathu mannagattiyavathu ! Unga mela thaan doubt, double confirmed hehe ;)
Ranjhith said,
December 9, 2007 at 10:21 am
@Sami
> rendu eduthalyum love poiduchuna
True. Marriage gaali thaan. I guess, it’ll go galli after a long time for the “loved” ones comparing the “arranged” ones.
> Unga mela thaan doubt
The fisherman was fished out when he went out for fishing. :)
ranjhith said,
December 9, 2007 at 4:51 am
@Sami
> rendu eduthalyum love poiduchuna
True. Marriage gaali thaan. I guess, it'll go galli after a long time for the “loved” ones comparing the “arranged” ones.
> Unga mela thaan doubt
The fisherman was fished out when he went out for fishing. :)
Ponnarasi.K said,
December 12, 2007 at 11:24 pm
Awesome post..
Enna Ranjhith… These days so many unexpectd posts from u :) U deluded the others these days :P???
Ponnarasi.K said,
December 12, 2007 at 5:54 pm
Awesome post..
Enna Ranjhith… These days so many unexpectd posts from u :) U deluded the others these days :P???
Ranjhith said,
December 16, 2007 at 12:42 pm
@Ponnarasi
Thanks. Deluded? Not at all. Just an apprehension. :)
ranjhith said,
December 16, 2007 at 7:12 am
@Ponnarasi
Thanks. Deluded? Not at all. Just an apprehension. :)